Friday, November 2, 2012


Sunni did a 180 today.  We walked in and the nurse told us she was not having a good day.  She had been in pain/uncomfortable/irritable.  She had to give her PRNs of both morphine and versed pretty often.  They also had to put the repogle back in due to spitting up. Her blood pressure is up again and her color is pale.

We immediately had flash backs of the last time this happened and it was the major buildup of fluid in her chest.  We asked to talk to the (new) doc who had been in the room several times without once saying hi or introducing herself.  We told her this exact thing had happened before and the jp drain stopped working and caused all of this. She said that a chest xray does not really show fluid on the lungs very well but a chest ultrasound would.  And then they ordered an xray anyway and the ultrasound for tomorrow morning.  In the meantime Sunni is VERY uncomfortable.  I have never seen her like this.  This has been the worst day so far, including ECMO.  She looks the worst, feels the worst, and we do not feel like they are giving her the care and attention that she needs.

The room has gone from 5 babies to 8 and the nurses can not really seem to catch up.  I am not very happy right now with our current situation.  I know that some things are out of doctors and nurses hands but I feel like something could be done in this case.  Instead they are doping her up which only gives her about 10 minutes of relief most of the time.

And to make matters worse Shawn found out he will no longer be getting paid next week.  There was a misunderstanding somewhere down the road on that deal.  So he had to decide whether to go back to work next week or take some more time off unpaid.  AND our car got "tapped" and the lady left a note on our car in the parking garage.  Its not that bad, just scuffed up, but sheesh!!

I know this is a different tone for me.....but today has been rough to say the least.  I am tired and feeling defeated.  I feel exhausted from trying to stay strong.  I just want to break down and that be ok.  Its not fun to hold back tears all day long.  My faith is really being tested right now. 

 Can we please get another 180 tomorrow in the opposite direction?


  1. as a former ICU nurse i would suggest you follow your Mama instincts and ask to speak to the attending physician to voice your concerns. Or try speaking to the nursing supervisor and then ask to speak to the administrator on call. You and Sunni deserve to have all your observations and gut feelings respected and addressed.

  2. Oh Whitney, this sounds so hard. I can just hear how worried you are. I remember Sam hit a point like that at about 8 weeks old and I ended up standing in the hallway saying loudly "I want an Attending, please." I got one. And it helped a lot. I hope that you get some turnaround from Miss Sunni AND that you can feel more confident in the care around you. Big hugs, mama.